Tuesday, February 19, 2008

ONE OF MY BIGGER STRUGGLES

I've had such a hard time learning some leadership traits. For one, I'm just now at 60 years old getting a feel for volleying opposing ideas without feeling personally attacked. I know this doesn't make me look good. Such is my point. I don't look good.

From the very beginning of Memorial World the elders would say, "You are just too sensitive." Well....to my credit maybe we needed some sensitivity around here....would be my usual silent debate under my breath. Truth: I was too sensitive. I think I still am.

The elders and staff have helped me learn that self isn't supposed to be the purpose of plans and ideas. What's weird is I can quote passages which teach it, but I couldn't seem to get it in my heart. Through decades of patience I feel like I am finally coming over the horizon with growing understanding of what they have been trying to tell me lo these many.....decades.

I have made such big deals out of things and totally missed the picture....the bigger picture. While intensity does have its place in getting kingdom things moving, self-defense is not one of them. Jesus shrugged such a pattern. His walk wasn't about Him. It was about the Father connecting with the children. Ours is the same calling.

I'm enjoying leadership more. Life in the church is progressing. I don't yet possess a knack for the best leadership. But the committed patience of my colleagues has given me the room to consider growing up.

If you have a guy like me in your midst, do your best to be patient. He might get there one day. I remain grateful to get to learn the simple things of leadership. I'm assuming some of you do as well.

4 comments:

Terry Laudett said...

I thought that you may like to know that Bobby Ross' article about you and your baseball ministry is now on the Christian Chronicle's site (http://www.christianchronicle.org/article944~From_the_pulpit_to_the_dugout).

Terry L.

Terry Laudett said...

I'm sorry that the entire address cannot appear in my first comment, but you can get to the article from the homepage at www.christianchronicle.org.

Terry L.

Stoogelover said...

The final few years of my ministry were the very best. I was just beginning to clear the fog so I could almost figure out what and WHO it was all about!

Anonymous said...

As a fellow-preacher and co-struggler with this sensitive/ ego/defensive issue, I hear you loud and clear. I am my own worst enemy, at times. And this not a defense (see, here I go being defensive!) or a rationalization of our weakness in this area, but I truly believe we are part of a worldly/success-oriented mind-set that feeds off our sensitivity of wanting to do the right thing. And the truth is - nothing is ever done from a purely altruistic motive (Rom. 7: 14f). The answer - recognizing it (as you have) and staying committed to struggling against it. I think we would call that, "being faithful unto death..." Thanks for being open and honest, Terry.
John