The church is a glory in which to work. I love, love getting to work in the church. Such wasn't always the case for me and isn't the case for far too many today. Misery is in too many camps due to church misorganization. In each you'll most likely find preachers, elders, and deacons. It's the added significant and untitled leader of which I address: the critic. One doesn't have to strain to hear the cry of sinking hearts as they live in a work guided by the overly-opinionated church critic.
How does this happen? How does the Matriarch or Patriarch or simply Ms. Whiney-Butt rule the church 'til their death and its death? This is going on en mass. Any of the three can be sweet if they want to be as long as church goes their way.....and it eventually does. That's why they won't leave. The truth is they control and God does not. How do they gain such power.
Here's their approach: they either are an elder or an elder is their puppet. How wearying are the elders' meetings because there is one who objects to everything. One of my former elders (who was a good one) always referred to this as Minority Rule. The puppet rules. Dreams are quenched. Efforts are squashed. And....good, ambitious young men trying to preach become disillusioned.
I plead with elders who are observing this going on in your camp. Please take a courageous stand and stop this death-talking one who has been mistakenly placed in leadership. He holds great power over the other elders. Not all, but some are afraid to stand up to him. His stifling words of negativity and disapproval are terrorizing your own flock. Wake up, please, to the darkness and frustration that you feel, your preacher feels, and obviously your flock feels because fewer children attend and fewer yet become faithful adults. Stop the fear-leading in your midst. One among you may be the Grand Leader in this....or he may simply be the critic's puppet.
Many congregations are throw-backs of the slaves leaving Egypt; full of people trying to escape but simply going nowhere in circles. The church is so tired of this, but have no voice. They are mysteriously overruled and trumped by the church ruffian whom no one will dare counter. Souls are being lost while meeting after meeting discusses how to win someone new. Stand up, for kingdom's sake, and save the one's you've got.....including your young preacher!
7 comments:
Sometimes I read your blog and think you must have lived in my skin! Then I realize (sadly) that this story you tell is repeated so often in so many churches that it could be written by almost anyone in any church across the country...
I will say that this scenario may be less prevalent outside the buckle of the Blble Belt... my experience is this: churches outside the belt are too busy trying to survive for such bullying to be tolerated...
Anyhow, amen to your plea that elders stand up and excise this cancer that will invariably kill the body.
God Bless!
Here's a question, Terry: what are the 'worker bee' members to do when they are continually beaten down and their efforts for good are thwarted time and time again?
I lived in that situation for 35 years (serving as deacon for the last 9), and finally decided to leave 'my home church', and take my precious wife and 3 daughters to a small church plant which had begun to meet in a neighboring town.
God has blessed that decision every day since! I do not have ill feelings for my friends who still meet there, but I sometimes ache for them and wish they could escape the slavery of traditionalism and terrorism which rules that body.
I know I have answered my own question... perhaps the real question is this: why are some of my dear friends still willing to live in that type of spiritual slavery?
Blessings...
Terry: Recently I was involved in the funeral / memorial service of an ex elder / puppet from our church. Thankfully the other elders did not allow him to rule over them nor the church, but he was the voice of the dissidents in our church. Over the years about 95% of them left. As I sat on stage and looked out over the all-but-standing room only crowd, it was a roll call of church bullies and nay-sayers. I heard over 2 hours of comments on what a great guy this person was and I suppose in their circles he was. But I never knew the man described in the funeral. And if that audience of grace assassins was the testimony of his life, it was a sad testimony indeed.
Tim,
I'm going to respond to both of your comments. First, thanks for your intense interest in kingdom matters. All of your comments verify that judgment.
Regarding your first comment, the "Critic Dilemma" is not unique to the Bible Belt. It is ultra-present in all locales.
Regarding your second you asked, "What are the 'worker bee' members to do when they are continually beaten down and their efforts for good are thwarted time and time again?", there are several things:
* Worker bees need to become believer bees. Believe God can.
* Pray and pray and pray thanking God for His resolving this conflict. It took 17 or 18 years at Memorial before we seemed to break through. It was slow and oft discouraging, but it was God who grew all of us into Him.
* Read Romans 4:17-25 and believe life can actually spring from dead settings because of the resurrection power residing in each believer. How do we expect to make a big difference in the world if we can't make it within the flock?
* Go to school while in the center of discouragement and conflict. Don't waste this opportunity.
* Realize God is waiting on someone(s) to believe in Him. Much darkness gets to continue unchecked because the believers will not apply their faith in Him.
* Stand up to such controllers. After seven years at Memorial it was the deacons to insisted the elders all resign. Three followed suit graciously. Others balked in varius degrees, but were steadily encouraged by the deacons to resign.
* Study Jesus and study Jesus and believe Jesus and teach Jesus and preach Jesus. He would die for his enemies. Many leaders must die while they live in order that others get opportunity to come to life.
* Do your best to remember that while being assertive, we might be wrong. God will open and close the right doors. He will be there. He will do the battle. He will bless. We can count on it!
I hope some of this helps. Good question which is on the hearts of many readers, Tim. There are no well-defined answers that I can give. Each setting is different. Therefore, I offer no law. I intend to offer hope for every believer as we are all in kindergarten when it comes to handling His electric power.
Blessings to you....day by day!
Really good aritcle! What I've learned in the school of Jesus these past few years: how to love the critic while you stand up to him.
Terry ~
Great stuff! Just, great stuff! I am glad I get to learn a few lessons from your experiences! It is nice to have a forum where people can gain "instant" encouragement!!! Praise God for the internet! :)
May God bless indeed!
Still in Kindergarten...
Terry,
Wow. I am glad that I came across your blog. I have been in many situations that you speak. I am a young minister. I was youth minister for eight years and knew that God had called me to preach. No church would hire a young twenty year old minister right out of college so, I had to my time as youth minister. I have seen over the short time in ministry churches split, elders mistake their roles as CEO's instead of real compassionate leaders for the Lord's church. I have seen the abuse. I have been abused by the "church" "elders". I got out of ministry for about a year because I got burned out. I am back into full time preaching ministery at a small country church in the Hill Country. God knew what I needed. Just like Jonah I tried to run from God. You can't. I found that out the hard way. God found me and put me where I need to be. I am preaching at a church that love and cares for me and my family. No elders. Just a grace, loving, family of Christians who love God.
In November of this past year I got GBS and was in ICU for about two weeks and in the hospital a month. The church stepped up and poured their blessings on me and my family. I am blessed.
I believe we need move churches who are driven and lead by the Spirit.
God wants and desires His church to be doing His will and when we do His will whether it is elders, deacons, ministers, Christians, we will be blessed.
I found out in the hospital that Christianity isn't about me. It is about submitting everything ever to God. Giving every thing in your life as a Christian over to his will: life, family, ministry, fianances, everything. It is hard to do. But when you do that, everything in your live changes in the relationship you have with God.
Sorry this is so long.
I just wanted you to know that this post touched me. I understand what it feels like. I love your blog and will read it daily.
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