Monday, April 02, 2012


I'll just tell you how it is. Yesterday's awful---see yesterday's post---turned out to be more awful than anticipated.

A visitor of four months unloaded on me yesterday morning just as services were beginning. I really like this man and have visited with him often during these multi-weeks. He was mad.

No one speaks to you here. You can't break in to these cliques. It broke my heart.

I hate it when anyone visits Memorial and doesn't sense the welcome they deserve.

Here I was just about to preach and Bob just couldn't quit peeling away at my heart. I finally had to walk away, go back to my office, dry my sissy tears, and move back in. My heart was not in preaching.

My heart was not in preaching the way I want my heart to feel. Yet, I thanked God for the upset for evidently my heart needed adjustment to preach the way God intended.

The sermon was okay.

When it was over, Bob approached me with apology for his poor timing and then lit in again as to how unfriendly this place is. Oddly, I had noticed one of our members chatting with him and his wife just before he approached me for round two. Stranger yet is that while he was dispensing his aggravation, one of our members butted in to greet him and then moved on.

My point is I wasn't in heart to do my sermon yesterday. I had to trust God I was in the form He desired. Sometimes, our heart doesn't feel like it is in it. Our duties insist we are on whether the mood has stricken. And....God will use us anyway.


Brian McCutchen said...

Our availability in kingdom work can cause the most grief. Our usability can be taken advantage of by non-Spirit led people. But, God is always on the scene equipping us with power He unleashes within us to sustain us.

Your tears are God's ever present love in your heart for the Bob's of this world. Never allow your eyes to dry for they are not sissy tears, but rather, the tears of compassion.

You are loved, Terry!!


Anonymous said...

How great is the way that God works! Bob sees the need for Memorial to be more welcoming--sounds like he has an assignment from the Lord to enlist his services as an exemplary welcomer. How cool is that!

Jarrod Spencer said...

WOW! I am sorry you had to endure such a verbal ax chop! I hate it when I get mentally distracted right before I preach.

I so want to do a good job and then when something happens, I just feel even more inadequate.

I try to remember that it is an opportunity to lean/rely on Him more and my abilities less.

Thanks for the post and the example!

Hope your week is going better since then!

Troy Singleton said...

Love you, man.

Troy Singleton said...
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