Saturday, June 12, 2010


I have been rather sad for the past few days.  So I tell you a true story of a couple who live some distance away.  The names are changed; but other than that, the story is true.

This is about John and Jane.  Jane has been one of my closest friends since third grade.  She married a great man.  He was smart, warm, outgoing, and highly successful in the business world.  I loved him as soon as she introduced us and he and I have been close friends for these past 45 years.

Wednesday night Jane came home to find John dead.  He had collapsed of a heart attack.  No warning.  Dead.

When I was notified I called Jane immediately.  I was surprised she answered the phone.  But she saw my name pop up and wanted to talk.  Completely stunned, she discussed how bizarre this was.  She kept repeating in rapid cadence as she gasped for air, This is awful.  Oh gosh, this is awful.  Oh Terry, this is awful.  Oh gosh.

I've called her early three mornings in a row as I can tell it is good for her to vent.  He was a marvelous man.  She loved him dearly; they lived in love.  She can hardly breathe.

But here's what I want you to get.  Each day my friend speaks of extreme regret.  She didn't realize how she needed to appreciate the moments much more.  She missed opportunities to verbalize her love for him because she felt she was too busy keeping up with work and those things we all find heaped upon our schedules. 

She spoke of one regret after another.

My heart can hardly take her mourning for she is understandably and properly so sad.  A vital part of her existence has been severed.  She is a very good woman and married a very good man. 

Jane suffers from something natural to all.  From so many aspects of humanity, she felt she didn't do enough during their years together to express how wonderful he was.

Whether families or friends, brothers or sisters, neighbors or colleagues, try to pay attention to the goodness all around.  It is abundant.....but we have a way of focusing on so many things which don't really matter in the face of death.  Live strong. 

See it....and then say so!

1 comment:

Michael and Vasca said...

I have been in this mode for some time but recently M and I had an intruder barge into our lives. In the form of a rare, incurable disease. Believe me, the two of us are acutely aware of 'each precious moment...a gift from God' and take full advantage of it. Do we ever tire of hearing the other verbalize how much love there is in our hearts for them? No way! Do we ever tire of having little tender touches seem mundane? No way! Every movement, every touch, every meeting of the matter how often...believe means ~ 'You're special to me and I love you more than anything'. No Regrets!!! Ever!!!